It came out of nowhere. That's how Mary described it later.

She was on her way home from the Merciful Savior's Home for Crippled Children. Riding in her Ford Excursion, listening to Toby Keith, and telling Iola that she really should go with the Pink Taffy nail polish.

The sky got dark.

Later when Iola asked her why she did it, Mary couldn't say. It turned out that by pulling the car off the road and slamming on the brakes, she saved both of their lives by avoiding getting hit by the Big Wheel.

That's what Fox called the aliens that night when she watched TV.

Without warning large wheels dropped out of the sky and onto all the major highways of the world. They took up two lanes, and they flattened all cars in their paths. The news told everyone to stay calm and to go to work.

The next morning, on her way to pick up Iola, she saw another one of the Big Wheels. This time, it avoided her, but just barely. It came inches from killing her, and when it passed by, rattling her Excursion so badly she almost spilled her Starbucks.

“They're not off the road,” Mary told Iola as her friend got in the car. “The danged government is lying to us again.”

“Can you stop by Walgreens? I ran out of breath mints.”

“We can't go to work today, dear. The Big Wheels will get us.”

“Well how are you going to pick up Jimmy and Bobby from school? And where are you going to sleep? My house? Hurry and get on the road or we'll run out of time. I need those mints.”

And did Iola ever need the mints. She smelled like a dive bar. Too many DUIs was the reason that Mary had to pick her up in the first place.

“If Nurse Socket smells you like that you'll be walking to the unemployment office.”

“Ah, come on, I just had an eye-opener. I'll be OK by the time we get to Merciful Savior.”

Mary started driving. “Tell me if you see another Big Wheel. I'm a bit worried about them.”

“The president said that he talked to the aliens; they call themselves Real People.”

“Real people? What's that make us?”

“He said that they are here peacefully, and that they didn't mean to hurt anyone.”

“Great! They didn't mean it but they did. Tell that to those people who got ran over. And it's not just here. Iit's all over the world. I think we should find the head Big Wheel and blow him up.”

“Shh, that's crazy talk. You didn't listen to all the news, did you? If you talk about hurting a Big Wheel, you'll be locked up and tortured for being a terrorist. He said that the Big Wheels will hurt us to maintain their 'Way of Life.'”

“Why are they here? To run us down?”

“To help us. The president said we should be grateful to the Big Wheels and show them some respect.”

#

It was amazing what one could get used to. Whenever the sky darkened a little bit, Mary pulled off the road and clung to the steering wheel as her car shook. She felt small and insignificant, and kind of neglected by the government that she paid taxes to.

Nobody else seemed to notice the Big Wheels anymore. She never talked about them because whenever she brought them up, Iola or one of the other girls at Merciful Savior looked at her like she was crazy. There goes crazy Mary again on her Big Wheel Conspiracy kick. Why doesn't she get a life?

 #

On the two year anniversary of the coming of the Big Wheels, Mary was driving Iola home.

Mary said, “I know that they are people, too, but why call them 'Real' people? And why can't they go to jail for killing people? Won't that make them a bit more careful.”

Iola corrected her. That was what she was good at, dear old drunken Iola, “But the accidents happened in the past. We need to look to the future. Besides they only kill 20,000 people a year. And the president said it would be much less if humans were more careful with their driving. I mean, you know there are Big Wheels, so you are kind of responsible for getting run over by one. You should just get out of their way.”

Damned Iola. Always siding with the government and the Real People. Dammit now she was doing it. No aliens were Real People. Mary was a real person not some stupid alien in some overly dangerous and stupid Big Wheel.

Smack!

“Well this is it,” thought Mary. “Death by Big Wheel.”

From day one she knew it was going to happen; it was only a matter of waiting for her special day.

Then she realized that the Excursion didn't even shake too much. But Iola was screaming like the chicken she was. OK, they were going to die, but wouldn't she shut up about it?

After a moment of not feeling dead, Mary dared look out her windshield. She had to sit up a bit to look down far enough to see it on the ground. As soon as she realized what happened, she sighed with relief.

It was just a stupid bicyclist. The idiot had gotten in her way.

“You just killed a bicyclist, you idiot!” screamed Iola.